Hey my friends why am I writing about a retreat that happened 4 years ago? Well..the weird thing is that is happened almost to the day 4 years ago and somehow what I am about to write may help someone who is hurting and someone who may need help now!...This was a fabulous retreat that saved me and made me see things that I never did see before..I hope you all read it and understand that it was important and it could be important to someone else...
Womans Retreat April 22-24 2005
"Praise God! What a weekend! This was MY retreat!! I met the Lord! Through all the hardships that I have encountered, through all the prophetic words, whether I was struggling daily weekly or yearly..the Lord Jesus Christ told me this weekend that I was HIS!!
I know I always had been HIS, but I've been a failure and have been forgiven, I've made mistakes but knew they would be fewer and fewer. This time was different..(the retreat)..my generational curses have been healed!! My heavenly Father has seen my tears and counted each one, I was a little girl whose heart was like an onion with each layer being peeled until the core was reached..I was the one in the forest crying out..being lost and finding both my earthly and heavenly Father.
I remember also having a prophetic word about how my life was going to be majorly changed and the Lord was going to show himself in such a real way, what wonderful words..yet all were said 7 to 10 years ago (that would be 1995-1998). God's timing is not ours!!
Each time I felt like I was going through a miraculous change the Lord was only pruning me for the future. So I want to write down as much detail that I can remember for this weekend (April '05) Lets start with Friday night. I was tired and noticed a couple of the Spanish worship singers were on the microphone. So the enemy was tugging on my heart..boy was I pissed!! I should of been there not them~
Mireal Johnson-Sandbo was introduced as our speaker. The woman who introduced her said "This special woman grew up in Bay Ridge Brooklyn, NY...I immediately knew something was up.. I GREW UP IN BROOKLYN. She then got up and started the usual sessions..one thing I noticed was that she had a tendancy to get on a lesson and drifted off, but always came back. She then started speaking about how she gave her bicycle, as a 5 year old, to an older gentleman whose name was "Mr Kyvik". Mr Kyvik that was a guy I grew up with from Bklyn who was his great, grandfather!! My ears shot open!..she then said"in a church named Salem Gospel Tabernacle"! Did God ordain this weekend or what! Each thing she said related back to my Dad, my past and the church I adored..I approached her adn she immediately knew my family, my Mom and Dad and of course me and my sisters growing up in NY...I started running around the retreat and telling everyone, "she was talking about MY church!!
Well, that was Friday night so lets skip to Saturday afternoon. The lesson was on Genesis 12:24 about Abram, Sari, Haggi, Ishmael and Rebekkah. She spoke on how Abram slept with Haggai and how Sari became so angry with her and Haggai basically felt like "Hey what did I do, you wanted me to sleep with your husband so he would have a son"!! She was being loyal to her master..Because of all of this and the son no one wanted, there was generational problems. Ismael is Sudan Hussan 16 descendants back Grandfather!! (well now he was..Sudan Hussan..)
And then out of the blue, it was the Lord, she said "There was never a more loyal woman in Salem that I ever met than Jean Smith (my Mother), who put up with emotional abuse from a man, Malcolm (my Father)..She then looked at me and said "oh sweetie what you all endured, Honey where are you now, do you remember when I took you and your sisters shopping?" I was grinning from ear to ear. At this point in my life I needed her and she didn't know it. After all of this at a break she said to me, "Honey please forgive me, but you were hurt by your Dad, weren't you?" I nodded and said Yes..and then..after the break she said.."I want all of us to pray for Donna...Lord may all the pain and hurt she has gone through be gone in your name and all the the generational curse's be healed"
I know more was said because I was incomplete awe and knew Jesus was in the midst of this meeting..She said to me privately, "I hope you forgive me for saying all that about your Dad". Forgive you!! I am being healed!! Healed and released of all my hurt and pain from my Past abuses! I will no longer be crawling and falling but I will be working, holding my head high and knowing every thing I make will be done because Jesus allowed me to have a present and a future..of course I cried and told her about my pain and hurt. The Lord began a healing in me right then and there. After the afternoon was over I felt like a new woman..like the first time meeting the Lord. I felt alive, in love with Christ and on longer afraid of the world. Satan was defeated at the cross and he is a liar!! Jesus is alive in me!!
To come to an end to this retreat 4 years ago I want to tell you what she said in her sermon.
"It was a continuation of Abraham, Sara, Lot, Issac and Rebekkah. This I concentrated on hearing her through all the stories intertwined with Genesis. When she got to Rebekkah and the camels she had to feed at the well, I knew I wanted to be like Rebekkah. A woman who was asked by Lots servant, "Can I have a drink? She not only fed the servant but according to history, she gave gallons of water to the camels as well as cleaned them. The question to us was..are we willing to do things with no agenda!! If we think about it do we ever do things without a reward?!
People in church love to volunteer for things such as worship, childrens church, etc. and all of a a sudden if the Pastor doesn't give them a "hand" or some sort of attention, they quit!! We have to do all things, whether in church or out of it (in the world), without an agenda. If we are a light in our jobs, at home or at church, then we will glorify the Lord and that pleases Him..so much!! Isn't that what it's all about in this life!? ONLY TO GLORIFY HIS NAME!!?? YES!!!!
I could go on and on and I do have about 3 more pages..but ladies I want you to read this with understanding and realizing we all have the same issues but different times..I have to re read this over and over. I felt that someone really needed to read this and I truly hope the Lord brings it to light for someone or many..Praise God for His Mercy..and Praise Him for His healing on my Life and many others..
p.s. if you want the rest please ask and I will be happy to finish..